Archive for March, 2009
The Tribune has a lengthy article about Duncan and Jack Connolly, including a touching picture of former Algonquin neighbors mourning their loss.
“Neighbors realized something was wrong with the couple’s marriage shortly after they moved into their Algonquin neighborhood in 2003. Friends described Connolly as “controlling” and “manipulative” toward his wife and sons. Leichtenberg often would use neighbors’ telephones to call her parents because her husband didn’t like her speaking with them.
“She could never live a normal life,” former next-door neighbor Jim Gerardi said. “That’s the sad part about it, because he was watching every single move she made.”"
You can read the whole story here.
March 31 2009 | In the news | No Comments »
Further information emerges on the case of the two young boys found dead in downstate Putnam County and their ties to the area.
“McHenry County court records indicate the family lived in Algonquin until about 2006 when Leichtenberg filed for divorce and moved out of their home, first to Crystal Lake and then eventually the small town of LeRoy, Ill. The divorce petition accused Michael Connolly of “repeated and extreme acts” of mental and physical cruelty.”
You can read the whole story here.
March 31 2009 | In the news | No Comments »
The Northwest Herald has details on another tragic case of domestic violence- this time claiming the life of two young former McHenry County residents.
“BLOOMINGTON - A mother of two boys found dead three weeks after they were reported missing previously lived in McHenry County.
Mother Amy Leichtenberg, now of LeRoy, lashed out at the court system Monday for allowing her ex-husband unsupervised access to the children. Issues related to Leichtenberg’s divorce from Michael Connolly including orders of protection were handled in both McHenry and McLean counties. She filed for divorce in 2007 after 13 years of marriage.”
You can read the whole story here.
March 31 2009 | In the news | No Comments »
The Northwest Herald has yet another excellent article about financial abuse:
““He stopped me from finishing my … degree,” she said. “Any way that I could elevate myself, he’s stopped me from it totally.”
The Huntley mother is among others – mostly women – whose spouses take complete control of the household finances as a form of domestic abuse.
Financial abusers might give their spouses an allowance to buy groceries, require them to hand over their paychecks, not give them access to any bank or investment accounts, or restrict them from working, said Jane Farmer, executive director of Turning Point of McHenry County, a nonprofit organization in Woodstock that offers shelter and services for victims of domestic violence.”
It’s an excellent article about a common, but widely misunderstood form of controlling behavior. As you can see if you read the “comments’ section below the story on the Herald website, not all readers understood the article. it’s not about budgeting, or belt-tightening or being frugal, it’s about abuse and control.
Anyone can register with the Herald and add comments after a story- as you will see in this case, knowing anything about the subject is NOT required. Thanks to the TP supporters who jumped into the fray to defend our honor.
You can read the whole article (And the comments) here.
March 30 2009 | In the news and Programs | No Comments »
Remember! Kelli’s Cuckoo’s Nest in Cary will host a Meat Raffle to benefit Turning Point on Saturday, March 28th, from 2-5 PM.
They will be donating 10% of the register plus the proceeds from the raffle.
Kelli’s Cuckoo’s Nest is at 100 Crystal St. (Route 14) in Cary, right across the highway from the train station. See you there!
March 27 2009 | Events and Fundraising | No Comments »
“Please call your congressional Representative (Melissa Bean at 847-517-2927 or 202-225-3711 Representative Don Manzullo at 815-356-9800 or 202-225-5676) and ask them to sign onto the letter supporting FULL FUNDING of the Violence Against Women Act and the Family Violence Prevention and Services Act in the FY ’10 budget. Both representatives signed a similar letter last year. If they have any questions, they can contact Rep Gwen Moore or Rep Ted Poe who have signed on. It is crucial that you make these calls ASAP. This will help the funding of domestic violence programs and I cannot stress the importance so please take a few minutes and call now. Thanks, Jane”
VAWA was drafted by Senator Joe Biden’s office with support from a number of advocacy organizations including Legal Momentum and The National Organization for Women, which described the bill as “the greatest breakthrough in civil rights for women in nearly two decades.”
VAWA was reauthorized by Congress in 2000, and again in December 2005. The bill was signed into law by President George W. Bush on January 5, 2006. [1]
VAWA will be up for reauthorization in 2010.
March 27 2009 | Programs | No Comments »
“In 2008, stalking prosecutions statewide dropped to 54 from a peak of 302 in 1994, according to data compiled by the Illinois Criminal Justice Authority. Only 16 charges were filed in Cook County last year and 13 in the collar counties, the data show.
Among the reasons for the low number, experts say, is that the law too narrowly defines stalking, making it difficult to arrest or charge someone unless the victim was followed or placed under surveillance on at least two occasions and has proof of a threat. Others say the problem isn’t the law, but rather police and prosecutors who don’t take stalking seriously.
At the same time, many victims are unable to get a protective order unless they had a domestic relationship with the stalker or were sexually assaulted. The exclusions are glaring, according to critics who point out that under current law someone stalked by a neighbor or co-worker, for example, wouldn’t be eligible for a protective order unless there was an attack.
In a move to address some shortcomings, the Illinois attorney general and Cook County state’s attorney’s offices have crafted legislation broadening the definition of stalking. The measure passed the House this week and now goes to the Senate. A second bill would make it easier for stalking victims to get protective orders, supporters say.”
You can read the whole story from the Chicago Tribune here.
March 26 2009 | In the news | 1 Comment »
An interesting perspective from the Christian Science Monitor editorial page:
“An MIT study of female leaders running village councils in India found that by objective measures (building better wells, taking fewer bribes) women ran their villages better. American women are about to eclipse men in sheer payroll numbers – and they’re now majority owners of nearly half of the private companies in the country. Yet somehow the average working woman still devotes much more time to child care and housework.
What’s clear is that, on average, men overestimate their IQ while women underestimate theirs. And that may be a clue, in terms of effectiveness: While decisiveness and risk-taking matter, hubris (too often male) creates problems. Humility and collaboration (more often female) solve them. What explains the difference?
It could simply be a matter of emotional need, reinforced by generations of gender stereotyping. Seeking competition and challenge, guys do tend to cast things in shades of conflict: defaulting to a win/lose, right (”my”) position versus wrong (”yours”). On this point, scientists, who are mostly men, disagree. But there’s no doubt that social stability is compromised by masculine habits such as hostile takeovers, and paying enormous retention bonuses to men who’ve driven a business into the ground and have already left.
The difference could be evolutionary. Primordial hunters (men) had to make rapid decisions and act on them, right or wrong, but quickly. Chase that bunny! Club that rival! Run away! Gatherers (women), meanwhile, needed an awareness of the larger context – knowing which berry bushes would ripen when, how to keep the kids from clonking each other with rocks, and generally holding the tribe together and getting things done.
Or, in a world where our reverence for stature remains primitive, it’s possible women just have to be more creative, collaborative, and clever when they average five inches shorter and 27 pounds lighter than men. ”
You can read the whole article here.
March 26 2009 | In the news | No Comments »
A nice mention on the Examiner.com. Turning Point does accept used cell phones- these phones are then recycled and usable parts are sold. Turning Point makes about $1000 a year through cell phone donations. You can drop phones at TP, or at the Lakewood or Cary Village halls or at the McHenry Library.
“To help - do some spring cleaning. Clear out the drawer full of cell phones you don’t use anymore. I had 12 of them, with charges and other gadgets. Erase your personal data from the mobile phones and donate them to any of the agencies listed below. It’s FREE to do. The phones may help homeless people, women in dire circumstances, or challeneged families. ” You can read the whole post here.
March 25 2009 | In the news | No Comments »
2000 McHenry County residents will be getting a letter from Turning Point this weekend. As supporters of Turning Point know, recent funding cuts have left the law Enforcement AdvocacyProgram unfunded. As part of a campaign to raise money to fund this and other programs, Turning Point has sent the following letter to prospective donors.
Please, take a minute to read this letter from Carolyn Cox about Turning Point- a group that is working to make all our neighborhoods safer.
- McHenry County State’s attorney
Louis a. Bianchi
Dear Friend,
You have probably read some articles about me in the newspaper during the last five years. Prior to that time you may not have known my name unless we were in the garden club together; or perhaps our children went to school together. If you were shocked to read about my husband’s brutal attack on me in 2004, you were not alone. Even my closest friends had no idea I had been a victim of domestic violence for 40 years. I was very good at making excuses; at hiding my injuries; at making things work.
There seems to be a general belief that domestic violence just doesn’t happen to a woman like me, and that it doesn’t happen in an affluent neighborhood like Bull Valley. Many see it as something that happens to a young woman; to someone who doesn’t know any better. I now know it happens everywhere.
There is no “typical victim.”
I convinced myself that my situation wasn’t “abuse.” Some of the time my husband and I spent together was wonderful! We raised a family; built a business; made a lovely home. But there was also verbal abuse, name calling, and insults. And then that pinch became a push and then a punch. And all along, I made excuses; I made it work. I’d cover up a black eye with makeup, or tell friends I’d fallen. And I lied to myself–even on that horrible day that almost ended my life, I couldn’t believe it was my husband who was doing this to me.
Since that day, I’ve tried to get the word out.
I am getting on with my life, and I want other victims to know–you do NOT have to endure this abuse! You can get help. I tell women “Go to Turning Point and they will help you.” I certainly wasn’t aware of all Turning Point did before I needed their help.- I’ve become quite an expert since then!
Turning Point’s mission statement is “To Confront Violence Against Women and Children in McHenry County.” They offer counseling and emergency shelter and have helped many victims to rebuild their lives. And they do a lot more. One of their programs is called the Law Enforcement Advocacy Program (LEAP).
· LEAP is an innovative program that allows Turning Point to partner with 15 different law enforcement agencies around the county to improve the way domestic violence cases are handled.
· In short, LEAP helps to keep victims safe and hold their abusers accountable. In addition, it helps to keep ALL of our neighborhoods safe and peaceful.
· LEAP also is essential in making sure that victims of domestic violence have trained Turning Point advocates (and if needed, translators) to accompany them to court dates and offer them guidance and support.
· It also provides technical assistance and support for victims seeking orders of protection and helps to make sure those orders are enforced. In fact, in 2008 ALL emergency orders of protection issued in McHenry County were facilitated by Turning Point.
· These emergency Orders of Protection are court orders designed to help protect a victim from abuse by a family or household member–a legal document that a judge signs which orders the abuser to stop the abusive behavior. An Order of Protection is often the first step a victim takes to get protection from her abuser.
It was incredibly difficult for me to testify against my husband–to finally stand up and speak the truth about the decades of abuse and humiliation I suffered at his hands. And I was luckier than most–I had good friends who stood by me throughout the trial and offered me support and understanding. But I also had Turning Point advocates who were in the courtroom day after day, and I don’t know what I would have done without them. I am glad to know that every victim who has to go to court to stop her abuse has a Turning Point advocate there to help them through the process.
But this program is in danger!
Turning Point has been notified that the federal grant that has funded this vitally important program ($200,000 annually) was not renewed. In fact, the funding has already been discontinued. Turning Point is seeking other grants to fund this program in the coming years, but in the meantime, I am writing to you to ask you to help Turning Point to continue this important program.
I’d like you to do two things
Of course, I hope you’ll write a check and send it to Turning Point in support of this program. But I am also hoping you’ll do something more important and probably more difficult. Talk to someone about Turning Point. Bring it up at your garden club or at your PTA meeting. We need to break the silence and make sure the women who are suffering abuse in silence realize there is help available.
Enclosed are a return envelope and a pledge card. Please, send a donation to Turning Point today. Together, we can make a difference and make our neighborhoods safer and more peaceful.
Thank You,
Carolyn Cox
P.S. If you would like more information about Turning Point, their LEAP program or domestic violence in our communities, please call Executive Director Jane Farmer at 815) 338 8081 or visit the Turning Point website at WWW.McHenryCountyTurningPoint.org.
March 24 2009 | Fundraising | No Comments »
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